Ramblings on the Sox and Christianity...

Okay, so I am NOT a baseball fan. The game bores me unless I'm at the stadium in person and, even then, it kinda bores me. It's not exciting. It takes too long. The uniforms are un-cool. :) Whatever, JMHO. But, in the realm of professional baseball I do cheer on certain teams. My teams are: Red Sox, Yankees, Rockies, Cubbies, Mariners. They are all teams of cities/states where I have lived and I feel connected to them somehow.

So, this posed a dilemma this year...should I cheer on the Sox (top of my list as I am a native Mainer and have lived in Boston x3 plus my dad was a HUGE Red Sox fan)...or root for the Rockies (I lived in Colorado longer than the total time I ever lived in Boston, the Rockies are in their first World Series, BikeBoy and I were partial seasons tix holders one year when we lived within walking distance of Coors Field). I basically had decided to root for both by wishing for a 7-game series which resulted in Boston winning again (2nd time in 4 yrs...screw the curse!).

Then today I read a column on CNN that the Rockies are the most "faith"ful team in baseball. They have prayer calls over the phone, they pray before games, they are the only team to hire a full-time chaplain on staff, they had a "Faith Day" for their fans where Christian Rock bands were invited to play (blech!!). To each his own but that really turned me off a little. What about any team member who doesn't believe in God? Do they have to go along with this faith BS just because that's the way the rest of the team believes? I just thought it was weird...kinda like businesses which put the little Christian fish symbol on their signs or business cards, you know? As soon as I see that damned fish I run as fast as I can in another direction! LOL!

So, today I decided to just root for the Sox and they pulled it off tonight and I am very happy for them! Now...time to get on to one of the only real professional sports seasons...HOCKEY! :) Go Avs! Go Bruins! Go Rangers!

ETA: Okay...I just googled "Red Sox, Christianity" and found some articles on the 2005 team and how religious they all freakin' were! Crap. Baseball and religion. It sounds as bad as NASCAR now. Oh, well.

Preschool version of bullying???

I chaperoned Munchkin's trip to the organic pumpkin farm yesterday. It was an exercise in patience. To start with, Munchkin freaked when I wouldn't let her take an armful of stuffed kitties on the tour (it was an incredibly muddy day and I didn't want to deal with her reaction should a kitty or kitties fall in the mud...not to mention that she would need her hands for picking a pumpkin, holding the handrail to the hayloft, etc.). I finally put one kitty in my purse and left the rest in the car but she continued to scream for a good ten minutes...the whole walk from the car to the farm, while waiting for the tour to start...it sucked. Plus, I had another child with us ("A," a girl whose parent couldn't make it) and I had to let the teacher and another mom handle her while I dealt with Miss Tantrum.

Then, A didn't really want to stay with me once Munchkin stopped the tantrum since she doesn't know me. She wanted to stay with "C"'s mom since her mom and C's mom are friends and they all hang out together. So...I kind of let her go with C's mom (C's mom didn't have a background check clearance so officially she couldn't drive another student--even a friend's child--on a school trip).

Then, C proceeded to take two hands and shove Munchkin in the back while they were all standing to have their picture taken before the start of the tour. Munchkin fell down on her knees into the mud and sat there. She started screaming, "I hurt myself!" and crying about being covered in mud. C's mom said she thought it was an accident and C proceeded to say, "I'm sorry" to Munchkin--one of those sorry's which makes no eye contact and sounds really insincere.

Then, the farmer asked all the kids to sit on the steps of the barn so that she could tell them about the hay maze up in the loft. There were four little girls on the top step and Munchkin walked up the steps and sat in the last spot next to them. Along comes another girl, "M," (a girl who Munchkin has always told me is mean to her) and M proceeds to grab Munchkin by the arm and say to her, "Munchkin! Get up! I want to sit there! Munchkin! Move! That's my seat!" Munchkin just kept holding her ground and saying, "No!" and after the bratty kid torqued her arm for the 4th or 5th time I saw my girl take her tiny hiking-boot-covered muddy foot and kick her in the shin! (YOU GO GIRL!) By this time, M's mom had finally taken notice and told M that she needed to sit somewhere else. (YOU'RE DAMNED RIGHT, LADY!)

THEN...we're walking through the pumpkin patch, headed back to the wagon for our ride back to the barn when Munchkin sees who is walking in front of us with his mom and dad. Munchkin proceeds to say, "That's N...he's the one who always pushes me on the playground!" N's mom heard her say this and says, "What does N do????" and I had no idea what to say so I said, "Oh, it's nothing, don't worry about it." and we just all kept walking. Of course, Munchkin has mentioned N at home, saying he pushes her a lot so I'm betting he really does.

So...we saw the pigs, we saw the chickens, we saw the hay maze, we chose a pumpkin, we had a hay ride, we got the hell outta there...thank goodness. And I now have plenty to talk about when I go in for the first conference of the year in 3 weeks.

It's hard to watch things like that start to happen to your own child. I remember the way it feels to be picked on. I don't want Munchkin to feel that. Ever. I know that's not possible but I really wish I could prevent it. She's now the oldest child in her class but she is still one of the smallest in stature...I think the other kids take advantage of this (or try to). I don't usually approve of kicking or hitting but I was so glad she finally kicked that little girl yesterday--she'd had enough yanking on her arm, she knew she had the right to sit in that spot, she knew the girl was being mean and my little girl said "no" until she was practically blue in the face--she finally kicked out in desperation and I didn't scold her for it.

BikeBoy thinks we should start looking into a TaeKwonDo class for her or something. Anything that might build her confidence and the ability to stand up for herself later on. I had heard that girls can be mean but I had no idea how young it all starts. I cried tonight telling my mom about it...I cried out of frustration that I couldn't prevent it, that I didn't know how to handle it.

But today was a better day...ice skating for an hour with a buddy and that buddy's mom--over an hour at the rink and it was a blast! Then we had Subway lunch with them. Then, after running errands, we ended up at the neighborhood park and many of the neighbor kids were there. Munchkin was so kind and caring of the 2-and-under set...she helped gather them up when their moms said it was time to go, she played peek-a-book with a couple of them, she played hide-and-seek with another, she kicked a ball back and forth with another. She just knows how to treat younger kids and the littlest ones just seem to adore her. It makes me proud of her and makes me think how much she will like being someone's big sister someday. :)

I can't believe I have a 5 yr old!...

Today was Munchkin's b-day! We actually celebrated last night: went out to a local pizzeria then came home to open presents and have a slice of Barbie cake! Today BikeBoy left to crew at a race for Brody B. so I went to Munchkin's school alone for the Birthday Circle. We brought treats (donut holes and melon balls) and a special book to donate to the class (which I then had to read...I didn't know I had to do that!). It was very fun then Munchkin got to leave w/me which was a treat in itself since we left before school was actually over (thrilling to her!).

Then her best friend, A, came over w/his mom and dad and we all walked to the neighborhood park to share more donuts and juice with some neighbor friends. It was the first nice-ish day in a couple of weeks so it was fun to play outside for a while.

Tonight we just ate leftovers and watched "Peter Pan" together...falling asleep on the couch, curled up under a blanket! A nice couple of days to celebrate the most special girl in the world.

Grandma was sorry she couldn't be here this year but she's hoping to be here for Xmas for the first time.

And I can't write a birthday post without mentioning Munchkin's birthmama. We mention her every night in our prayers to Mother Earth and the Great Spirit...we hope she is happy and healthy but on this day I hope she knows that Mia is happy, healthy and so completely loved by us...I hope Birthmama has no regrets and has a deeper knowledge that she did the best thing. I think that is one of the truest examples of love because it must've been so hard to do. Thank you, Munchkin's Birthmama...may you be gentle with yourself at this time and find comfort knowing how much we love "our" little girl.

Another butterfly death averted...

Last night I was rinsing the dishes and heard the desperate flap of butterfly wings. I looked over to the net and saw one of the 'flies was on his back, stuck to the bottom of the net (probably the sugar water had made the floor sticky). He was trying to right himself but was clearly utterly exhausted and unable to do it. His 4 friends looked on. So...I dropped a few dropperfuls of plain water near the edges of his wings and he loosened up a bit but was still unable to right himself. I found a long pair of chopsticks (the type used when cooking w/a wok) and held the tip of one just above his body. He wrapped his little butterfly legs around the tip and held on while I hoisted him up and set him gently down again atop a wadded tissue. It doesn't escape me how he seemed to know exactly how I was trying to help him and what to do. He looked relieved (really). So...he lives on for...what?...maybe another week or two?...but I'm happy about that anyway!

Parenting Beyond Belief...

is an incredibly cool book edited by Dale McGowan. If you are at all a secular-type person with kids you will find it helpful, I think. I had reserved it from the library weeks ago and finally got to pick it up last night. It is filled with essays related to raising our kids in a religious world but with different beliefs. It gives great recommendations for further reading (books, articles, websites).

There is even a study guide which might assist discussion (at least for older children) or at least some deeper consideration.

This is all so timely since it coincides with Munchkin's and my first official trip to "church" recently (a UU church for her to try a religious ed/exploration class). The church itself seemed very welcoming but I'm not sure I'm ready to give up our only free weekend day just yet. I know, that's pretty petty, isn't it? But I don't feel ready to commit. The experience was fun, though...we both got to participate in a class for 3-5 yr olds and it was lead by a transgendered woman. Certainly the congregation itself seemed diverse and accepting. We may go back eventually or we may try another UU congregation to see if the fit feels even better. This book also mentions Liberal Quakerism as being an option for atheist/agnostic parents who wish for more community...things to consider.

It's just really nice to know that there is a community out there for us somewhere.

Ramblings...

So we were actually home in Maine for about 10 days in August. So good to see the family and several friends...eat some lobster rolls, smell the ocean air. I miss it so much...hard to believe that I spent the first 18 yrs of my life waiting to get outta there--so much to do and see beyond my slightly sheltered and very WASP-y world.

Managed to take Munchkin by train into Beantown w/Grandma to visit a special group of friends and their kids. We hung out, saw the "Make Way for Ducklings" ducks, rode the swan boats...had a great time. I have such fond memories of Boston--both from trips there as a child and also from college days and beyond. Heck, that's where BikeBoy and I met and it will always be special.

On the way back to the plane (in Newark!) we hung out in NYC for a few hrs. Showed Munchkin our old 'hood (she couldn't have cared less). She did yell out, "This is AWESOME!" as BikeBoy sped down 5th Ave with the rest of the traffic, trying to avoid street closures before the Dominican Republic's parade. We had a slice at Ray's and walked along Bleecker (almost ducked in for a John's pizza, too, I might add!) and had an ice cream. Played at the two playgrounds in Washington Square Park. Although we lived there (nearly 20 yrs ago now...17, I guess) I cannot imagine raising a child there. Not that I wouldn't want to...I think I would, I just have a difficult time picturing it. I watched moms pushing strollers ($1000 strollers, BTW) along the narrow, crappy sidewalks of the Village, trying to maneuver into tight doorways and up the stairs to brownstones. I can't even imagine trying to take the subway somewhere...and how competetive preschools are (and how expensive). It seems so much easier to do all this from the 'burbs.

But then I took Munchkin to a kids' improv theatre in a funky neighborhood in "the city" here today and it was so fun. We walked around a bit waiting for the show to start...so many restaurants and independent coffee shops. Munchkin kept running ahead of me on the sidewalk. I asked her, "Do you like it here in the city or out where we live better?" She said, "Where we live...no...BOTH!"

When I read MetroDad's posts about life in the city w/the Peanut I think it just sounds fun...different than our lives but fun. And having grown up in the 'burbs myself I know how much trouble youths can get into there...how can it be any worse in the city? At least you wouldn't worry about your child driving while under the influence--we wouldn't even have a car. So many cultural events all within walking distance--museums, galleries, opera, symphony, ballet, theatre, rock concerts, ethnic restaurants--heck, entire ethnic neighborhoods, etc. It is a magnificent feast for the senses! And the diversity within the city always makes me smile. No diversity where I grew up and not a lot of it where we live now either. As the parent of a TRA I am so much more aware than ever before.

I guess I'm just a tad bit jealous of those who make the choice to rear their kids in the city. I often wish we could.

Look, Mama! I fed the butterflies!...

...is something you don't want to hear from your 4 yr old. I was washing the dishes and looked over and Munchkin had dropped a chunk of watermelon in the butterfly net-house and a butterfly was lying partially UNDER the melon chunk! It was desperately twitching, trying to free itself. I had to unzip the top of the house and reach in with a pair of tongs (god-forbid that my hand actually touched a butterfly--eeeeek!) and lifted the melon off the butterfly--rescuing it! It kind of limped around for a minute or two, it's wings stuck together with melon juice but then it flapped a couple of times and was okay. Phew. A tragic ending prevented! :)

Mammogram time...

Yesterday was time to get my "girls" checked out. The hospital that I have this done at has a really new, high-falutin' mammography machine so there are long waits to even get an appointment. Once there you have to wait to check-in, then wait in another area for someone to bring you back to the changing rooms to put on a cape, then once you're caped up like WonderWoman there is a third area to wait in.

Well, yesterday the first waiting area had no magazines. None. Not one. There were three of us sitting there--one younger gal was reading a book. The other (a middle-aged gal, like me) says, "Geez, I can't believe there's nothing to read. I was counting on that. I would've brought something had I known there'd be nothing at all." I then thought about what I did before I left the house...I thought about bringing a book with me but the only one handy was one on menopause which I had just borrowed from the library. So, I said, "I was gonna bring a book but the only one I had was on menopause and I thought better of it." The other middle-aged gal say, "You shoulda brought it...could've read it out loud to us...maybe we could all learn something!" :)

A few new posts...

I have been terribly negligent...poor lonely blog. I only know of one dear friend who actually admits to reading this thing anyway so I have cut/pasted a few posts from a board where I'm a bit more active posting. Just a few things.

Oh, yeah...totally unrelated thought here...why is it that there are some things a kid says that are just so darned cute that we can't correct the pronunciation? Like Munchkin say's "hyneena" for hyena. I love it and I will try my darndest to work hyneena into any conversation with her just to hear it. :) A few others from the past: "kicken" (chicken), "doonin" (doing). I'll add more if I think of 'em.

Uh-oh...

Munchkin was up on the balcony peeking out between the rails and I asked her what she was doing...she said, "Thinking about Kindergarten and jail." WTF? I guess the rails seemed like bars on a cell? But WTF? BikeBoy says, "That's my girl! I always thought school was like prison."

First trip to the circus...

We took Munchkin to the circus last night (no bashing please...I feel guilty supporting the circus when I do not think it's the best place for the animals to be...). I just really loved the circus when I was a kid and wanted Munchkin to experience it at least once so we went.

She was in awe for the first 30 minutes. When the acrobats were doing some of their performance (swinging through the air and catching each other, etc.) Munchkin leaned over to me and says, "I wanna see YOU do that, Mama!" We didn't see much of the rest of the show--she wanted to walk around the souvenier booths and picked out a small stuffed white tiger ($15! Yikes!) then after intermission we went back and saw about 30 more minutes of the show and left after the poodles performed.

It was kinda fun...and sad for the animals...think we'll be doing Cirque du Soleil from here on out. By the way, I once got a form letter from C du S when they were recruiting PTs! Can you imagine if I had taken them up on that and called my mom to tell her I had joined the circus!

A menopausal rant...

I am in the throes of some perimenopausal or menopausal crap. I have been having hotflashes several times a day/night for a couple of weeks. It sucks. I have to wear a tank top and a sweater and be ready to rip the freakin' sweater off at any given moment while my whole upper body drips in sweat. I want to shave my head (I have very thick hair and my head just gets extremely sweaty). I want to go to work naked.

Tonight at the dinner table a hotflash came on. I had been doing laundry so all I had on was a bra and my lightweight robe. I took the robe off the top half of me and just sat there in my bra at the table! (Munchkin had already excused herself so it was just BikeBoy and me!) Then I thought, here I am, about to turn 46...that's 64 backwards...so I started bawling and asked BikeBoy if he'll still love me when I'm 46 (thinking of the Beattles tune re: 64)! Then I, for the first time, really thought that the chances are pretty good that my wonderful life is most likely more than half over now. THEN I started ranting that if it isn't bad enough that I went through 32 years of periods for abso-fcking-lutely no reason that I now have to have the world's suckiest version of menopause. It's like a slap in the face. And, let me tell you how pleasant it is to have a hotflash when I'm in these tiny treatment rooms with a client. Thankfully, because of my middle-of-the-day working hours, most of my clients are either elderly women or SAHMs so I can tell them what's happening (if they aren't already noticing!). PTs get to know their clients well--kinda like hairstylists do--so it's not unusual to chat about personal stuff...thank goodness.

So, tomorrow my goal is to find and buy as many soy products as I can. Soy milk, soy beans, soy nuts, Luna bars...whatever. If you have any recommendations on how to ease these damned hotflashes please share because I'm about to lose my effing mind.

The cat in the toilet story (finally)...

About an hour before Munchkin had to head out to piano lessons I started getting ready. So...we went upstairs and I set her up in front of the tv/PBS while I started getting ready to take a shower. I leave the master bath door open in case she needs me I can hear her or she can just come in.

So...I'm in there, (warning, major TMI alert but it is necessary to the story!!)...going to the bathroom (#2). Codythecat is in there, too. Well, I stand up to flush and the damned cat jumps onto the toilet seat before I can flush and shut the cover and he slips and FALLS INTO THE FREAKIN' TOILET.

Remember, I just went #2. Out splashes all kinds of dirty water all over me, all over the bathroom rug, all over BikeBoy's towel on the rack. And, of course it's all over the effing cat...who now is terrified and climbs quickly out of the toilet and runs out of the room, dragging his effing wet tail behind him.

I scream, "F***ing CAT!" (which, of course, Munchkin repeats, melodically) and give chase (well, after stripping off my now drenched in toilet water--and I don't mean the fancy name for perfume--pajamas). He runs downstairs and around and around the butcher block in the kitchen. He was like a greased pig. I finally catch him and take him upstairs where I shove him into the shower stall...trying to wedge my arm in the sliding door just enough to turn on the water and manipulate the water in his direction. He is wailing. I'm soaking him as best I can. He finally manages to sneak out, once again drenching everything in his path (but at least it's clean water this time). Munchkin is laughing hysterically. I am not. I give chase once again with a dry towel to try to dry off Codythecat. Then I got into the shower and realized how funny the whole thing really was and I broke into hysterical laughter.

Remind me to tell you about the cat in the toilet...

some night soon when I have time to type it out! It's pretty funny! :)

I won an award tonight! ;)

I took a quick bath w/Munchkin tonight as I had just returned from a 45 min walk and was sweaty and Munchkin needed a bath, too. What the heck! It was fun...we splashed around and poured water on each other and laughed. Then she says, "You're the best slippery Mama I ever had!" Then she rested her head on my tummy and said, "You're the best slippery Mama I ever rested my head on." LOL! What a cutie! I love her so much!

Intermediate Tap...

kicked my butt tonight! It was the first class and there were four continuing students there plus me and three of my friends who are moving on from the beginner class w/me. The teacher is nice and she put us through a slightly harder warm-up than our previous class. We also learned some triplets (open and closed) and a new combo done to the song "East of the Sun, West of the Moon." Very fun, very good workout. It was not as fun in a relaxing way as the previous class was but it is more challenging and that is fun, too.

TGFT! (thank goodness for tap!)

Munchkin is so musically diverse...

She knows the words to all these cool jazz tunes like "Straighten Up and Fly Right" and "Don't You Worry 'Bout a Thing" and and she can hum the tunes of "Paper Moon" and "Flyin' Home"...but then I tell her we're going to the symphony (last weekend's symphony for tots program) and she says, "Symphony of Destruction"? That is, of course, the Megadeth song she also knows how to hum!

Adoption ramblings...

Ah...the frustrations of the non-fertile. As the waiting period for China lengthens and lengthens I am now second-guessing our decision to adopt from there. Is the wait going to be two years? Three? Four or (gasp!) even more? Should we proceed as we are planning or should we jump ship now and switch to another country (which will mean switching placement agencies, too, since our agency only does China adoptions)? Is it ethical to apply to two countries at the same time, knowing that we only want one more child and would pull one application as soon as a referral from the other country came through?

All along we have hoped for two daughters...just because I have never been around baby boys, little boys, boys at all--other than boy friends once I was in high school and college. China would allow us to request a girl. Vietnam has many more boys available for adoption than girls...I know I would love any child who joined our family but when I picture our family complete it has never included a boy--it's odd to even consider it (but also a little fun to consider it, I must admit). Maybe it stems from having been raised by a widowed mom and that I had no brothers (or sisters!). I don't know what it is (and I certainly don't mean to offend anyone with precious boys--I still love 'em!!!) but it makes me sad to think that we couldn't request a girl through most agencies which work with Vietnam. And some agencies aren't even taking new families now because they have such long waitlists.

Then I wonder if a boy and a girl would be as close as two of the same sex could potentially be? Again, not having any siblings I have no idea how I would've felt about a brother or a sister. I never really longed for either. Munchkin knows we are trying to adopt from China and has been excited about a future sister...will she feel the same if sister ends up being brother?!

Crap. What to do, what to do. Meanwhile, the paperchase continues...just not sure who/where we're paperchasing and if it's all for naught in the end...

My friend, Chrisbo

Oh, just thinking about him tonight. This is a very belated post...he died on May 17th. He was a wonderful guy who was only 41 and he leaves behind a fantastic wife and two kids and my heart aches for them.

Chris had an astrocytoma brain tumor, diagnosed in 2003. He seemed to be fighting it so well for the first 2-3 yrs then it started winning. I was hoping he would get a miracle like Lance Armstrong but it was not to be, I guess.

Some words to describe Chris: kind, soft-spoken, smiling eyes, funny, intelligent, handsome, great skiier, great athlete, great friend, better dad/husband/son, excellent Euchre partner!, successful, a fighter (against the tumor). Just an all-around great person and one who will be tremendously missed by all who knew him.

Monday there is a celebration of his life in Michigan...BikeBoy is going but Munchkin and I are not. I wish we could be there but we will be in spirit. Godspeed, Chrisbo...I love you, my friend.

National Tap Dance Day!

I went to Nat'l Tap Dance Day at a studio in "the big city" and it was the coolest thing! I brought Munchkin and we both watched the 90 min show. Mostly young adults (I'm guessing about 20-25 yo but a few older high schoolers and a couple of older-than-me gals about 60ish)...several different styles from the torn jeans-no music-stomp-like stuff to the jazzier-girls-in-black-skirts stuff. Very cool. They had a surprise guest, this guy Mark Mendonca...he will be teaching some masters classes there in July. My teacher was in 4 numbers and she was just a joy to watch---so smooth and with a huge smile on her face like she was just having the time of her life! Watching tap dancers tap or participating in tap itself is just so uplifting--you can't help but smile listening to the rhythms and seeing the blur of those dancing feet!

Then...as if all that wasn't enough...at the end of the show we pushed all the chairs out of the way and the whole audience joined the performers for the Shim Sham (which I just learned for my own "recital")!!! I had to do it holding Munchkin since the music was loud and she was a bit overwhelmed by the sheer number of people dancing but it was fantastic! I can't wait until my next class!!